Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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