So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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