the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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