6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
