i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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