She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
