where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
