He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
