i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
