she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
He felt like a one man threesome
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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