You work out of a Hotel?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
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