So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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