I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
