You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
