There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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