3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Randomize
