i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
