Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
