I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
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