just come out here and I will go home with you...
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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