Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
