My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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