I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Randomize
