I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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