loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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