So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
