So gin and wine won't be happening again
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
