it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
