I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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