Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Green mimosas i think yes
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
