11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
wow bdsm is so cute
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
