the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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