Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on

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(773): In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on http://tfl.nu/7jta

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(408): View more from California

I think I just got seasick

(409): View more from Texas

you're not on a boat

(408): View more from California

he has a waterbed.

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(408): I think I just got seasick (409): you're not on a boat (408): he has a waterbed. http://tfl.nu/239c

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...

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(724): i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it... http://tfl.nu/6i0l

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.

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(978): The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room. http://tfl.nu/rw2d

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(856): View more from New Jersey

in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...

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(856): in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee... http://tfl.nu/v0er

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?

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(781): I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I? http://tfl.nu/0o9s

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses

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(203): Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses http://tfl.nu/2wtf

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(320): View more from Minnesota

3pm strippers are depressing

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(320): 3pm strippers are depressing http://tfl.nu/w12t

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.

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(401): Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world. http://tfl.nu/8eb4

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(248): View more from Michigan

Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..

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(248): Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced.. http://tfl.nu/34jd

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(250): View more from British Columbia

So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....

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(250): So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too..... http://tfl.nu/p12c

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(248): View more from Michigan

I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.

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(248): I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom. http://tfl.nu/9ssn

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.

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(+44): You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life. http://tfl.nu/zp27

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(702): View more from Nevada

Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?

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(702): Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated? http://tfl.nu/6luu

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(613): View more from Ontario

I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit

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(613): I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit http://tfl.nu/8e9o

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