my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
When are your genitals available?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize