The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize