I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
