Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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