i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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