Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize