quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize