Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
