Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
