in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
