I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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