butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize