real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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