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• (516): View more from New York

  so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.

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• (631): View more from New York

  im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

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• (206): View more from Washington

  He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...

  (1-206): View more from Washington

  He obviously understands you completely.

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• (949): View more from California

  Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently

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• (831): View more from California

  He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.

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  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom

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• (308): View more from Nebraska

  I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.

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