Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
