Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize