Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I deserve this hangover.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
