Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
